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  • One fly tells another, Madeline, as she flies away in a huff, that when he says she looks like crap, it's a compliment.
  • Two envelopes are talking about how Betty's husband got sent away.
  • Bubbles the fish is upset with wife because she ordered stuff from home shopping network, making him realize what it means to marry a suckerfish.
  • Famous last words from Charles Darwin, Thomas Edison, Leonardo Da Vinci, and Albert Bugleweed, whose last words were "Honey, how's your diet going'".
  • Wife tells husband, Albert, that expandability is a good feature for computers, not husbands, just as he has his mouth open extremely wide to eat an entire piece of cake.
  • One fowl says since Gregory was cremated, he feels like he is with him - and there is a can of cream of chicken on the mantel.
  • Husband faxes wife dirty diaper and asks for clean one in return because he doesn't know how to change the baby's diaper.
  • One soft cover book wonders if his wife only comes to the beach to look at the hard covers.
  • Male skelton tells female, Agatha, he suspected cheating, but didn't expect to find so many skeletons in her closet, there are real skeletons in closet.
  • Husband apologizes to wife for coming home late, says he hit every red light on the way, car has several traffic signals stuck to front.
  • Husband orange tells judge he wants divorce because he wanted kids and wife never told him she was seedless.
  • Turtle stuck on back after falling off ladder agrees to take wife to dinner and movie and buy roses if she will turn him over.


You searched for: husbands