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A bee decides a man isn't worth dying over, so he head-butts his eye instead.
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The groundhog's wife sees his eye shadow, so he's in for a long cold winter.
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A farmer hates harvesting spring chickens because their springs make them too bouncy to catch.
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Punxsutawney Phil's wife makes fun of the size of his butt.
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A skiier impales a groundhog on his ski poles.
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The big bad wolf blows his own house down because he sneezed.
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A snake eats the groundhog on groundhog day.
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The swallows return to cappuccino instead of Capistrano.
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A dog is annoyed that his mistress can dig and fertilize the garden, but he can't.
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A sofa is sick because it has spring fever.
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A lawyer tries to argue for a shorter winter.
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A fish sees an ice hockey player's legs floundering as he falls under the ice and thinks it's a sign of spring.
