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You searched for: new year

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  • The baby new year is worried what happens in a single year to turn him into the elderly old year.
  • A cat has a hangover after New Year's because he tore open his cat toy and ate the catnip.
  • A printer's New Year's resolution is 600 dpi.
  • A cork has a hangover from bouncing off the ceiling at a party.
  • Dick Clark pays off Father Time.
  • The secret to Twinkies' long shelf life is Dick Clark's DNA.
  • A man has to decide whether to die in a shark attack or keep his New Year's resolution to be honest.
  • Godzilla bites off the top of a champagne factory, which then squirts wine.
  • New Year's Day in emergency room sees patients with champagne bottle cork injuries.
  • A man named Old Hank Zyne is sad because he thought Auld Lang Syne was about him.
  • A crowd of cats gathers for a New Years fish bowl drop.
  • A woman keeps pushing her diet back until after the holidays, but once the holidays end her Girl Scout cookies arrive.


You searched for: new year