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Doctor operating says patient's rudeness and nasty disposition is treated by surgically removing the hair up his gluteus maximus.
Woman taking medicine labeled "Take Only As Directed" is following director's orders to take out one pill, then fill glass with water.
Doctor examines red and irritable rash on man's arm, and the rash calls him a cretin, and yells at him to get away and leave it alone.
Doctor tells patient who has dark stains under arms that he needs to exercise, eat healthy, and keep deodorant and spray paint in different cabinets.
Person wonders why box of cereal is empty, even though label says it has no sugar, no additives, no fat, and no calories.
Patient wants doctor's assurance before his physical that doctor's medical journals are more up-to-date than waiting room magazines.
Vein points to map of human body, giving weather report, including high temperature of 98.6, periods of high pressure, and frequent cold-bloodedness.
Doctor listens to pregnant woman's belly, she asks him how many heartbeats he hears because baby is in womb playing bongos.
Man tells co-worker Lynn is on phone, she's coming down with nasty bug, and Lynn is coming down from the ceiling with a giant insect.
Man asks giraffe with severely crooked neck if he can go in first to visit the chiropractor.
Man with injured right knee approaches two doors, door on left is left knee specialist, door on right is right knee specialist, nurse points him right.