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  • Patient at Dr. Grays Voodoo Acupuncture tells doctor that he feels better as doctor stabs needles into a voodoo doll that resembles the patient.
  • Doctor offers patient business card for a knee surgeon, who happens to be the doctor's brother, before he tests the patient's reflexes with a mallet.
  • Doctor and patient look at x-ray while he explains how her slipped disc puzzled him until he saw a banana peel near her spine.
  • Doctor tells patient according to tests, his diet is butterflies, bees, horseflies, and dragonflies, while patient makes mental note close mouth when riding bike.
  • The Earth is applying Preparation V to his backside to soothe burning because of painful volcanoes that just won't go away.
  • Doctor operating says patient's rudeness and nasty disposition is treated by surgically removing the hair up his gluteus maximus.
  • Woman taking medicine labeled "Take Only As Directed" is following director's orders to take out one pill, then fill glass with water.
  • Doctor examines red and irritable rash on man's arm, and the rash calls him a cretin, and yells at him to get away and leave it alone.
  • Doctor tells patient who has dark stains under arms that he needs to exercise, eat healthy, and keep deodorant and spray paint in different cabinets.
  • Patient wants doctor's assurance before his physical that doctor's medical journals are more up-to-date than waiting room magazines.
  • Vein points to map of human body, giving weather report, including high temperature of 98.6, periods of high pressure, and frequent cold-bloodedness.
  • Doctor listens to pregnant woman's belly, she asks him how many heartbeats he hears because baby is in womb playing bongos.


You searched for: healthcare