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The truth about dandruff is that it's debris from flea parties.
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Quasimodo became a hunchback because he sat at the computer looking at porn instead of getting up and stretching.
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Raccoons go through someone's garbage to gossip about him.
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A new mother has chronic fatigue and the causes are either the Epstein-Barr Virus, carbon monoxide poisoning, or a newborn baby.
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A chicken laments his stupidity for crossing the road and getting run over.
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A woman can't think of a reason not to go out with a man, but when he calls later she'll have had time to find one.
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A fish thinks her date stood her up, but he's really trapped in a whale's spout.
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A woman asks a saleswoman to talk her into buying a dress.