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  • Cyclops pirates are blind because they have eyepatches over their lone eyes.
  • A street near Las Vegas has a sign for crossing Elvis Impersonators.
  • A dog cheats by wearing night vision goggles.
  • A skiier impales a groundhog on his ski poles.
  • Billy's BB gun takes his eye out'on a date. Mother warns son about bb gun taking his eye out and she was correct, literally.
  • A container of Milk Duds has explosives that aren't "duds."
  • Everyone runs away from a man who's been sucking in his belly for 45 minutes because it's about to explode.
  • Superman tries to help someone who's choking on his food, but he squeezes the man's skeleton out accidentally.

  • An ant gets caught on someone's foot in a game of Twister.
  • A crash test dummy dad tells his son to bring the car back in worse shape than when he borrows it.
  • A man who lives in a glass house throws an anvil.
  • A turtle uses an anti-theft steering wheel lock on his shell when he's not inside it.


You searched for: safety