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  • Christmas tree isn't watered enough, so it takes the water from a nearby fish bowl.
  • A writer feels he is his worst critic but his wife assures him that she hates his writing more.
  • Mrs. Claus tells Santa she is with Frosty because doctor told her to apply cold to shoulders.
  • Husbands compare scars caused by their wives kicking them under the table for things they said.
  • Santa knows when Mrs. Claus is sleeping, and when she isn't sleeping.
  • Mrs. Potatohead is so worried about getting tan lines at the beach that she takes off all her body parts.
  • Dinosaur wife tells husband that if he eats the baked bean factory, he is sleeping on the couch.
  • Wife gives husband birthday gift of dent puller, touch-up paint, and auto body gift certificate, he asks if there's something she needs to tell him.
  • Bubbles the fish is upset with wife because she ordered stuff from home shopping network, making him realize what it means to marry a suckerfish.
  • Wife tells husband, Albert, that expandability is a good feature for computers, not husbands, just as he has his mouth open extremely wide to eat an entire piece of cake.
  • One fowl says since Gregory was cremated, he feels like he is with him - and there is a can of cream of chicken on the mantel.
  • One soft cover book wonders if his wife only comes to the beach to look at the hard covers.


You searched for: marital