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Flower bartender tells daisy drinking light beers isn’t how photosynthesis works.
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Overweight nutcracker eating doughnuts tells other nutcracker they count as nuts.
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Turtle caught hugging other turtle tells angry wife excuse he’s becoming a home inspector.
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Lazy people have lots of excuses for not working out at spin class.
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Teenager tells dad he's not brushing his teeth because he is seasoning them.
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Tried but nothing got clean parodies Tide laundry detergent.
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Man lands in hospital after mistaking poison for fancy microbrew.
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Smartphone excuses cheating to husband by claiming they were only taking selfies.
