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A woman wants her boyfriend to get a tattoo of her name, but he'd rather she wrote her name in sunscreen and he get a sunburn.
The Mob puts a man named Longfellow on the rack.
The Pillsbury Doughboy dies, and the medical examiner classifies him as a John Dough.
Sculptor ponders on a name for his latest sculpture, Relief Sculpture, which happens to be a toilet.
Two cats on game show, and Spunky wins all the mice, while competitor leaves with lifetime supply of press-on claws and home version of game.
During Oscar acceptance speech for "The Phonebook + You," Jake lists everyone he wants to thank in alphabetical order, implying that list will be long.
Legal department for The Beach Boys says the name has to be changed to The Beach Middle-Aged Men because "boys" is false advertising.