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One house tells another that the female house on the corner is nice to look at, but there isn't much upstairs.
Wife gives husband birthday gift of dent puller, touch-up paint, and auto body gift certificate, he asks if there's something she needs to tell him.
Derek asks woman if she'd like to dance, she says yes, then says, "Wait, you didn't think I meant with you'".
Lucy, the blood cell, runs off with another blood cell in the artery, while Tim, the blood cell, waits in vain - in the vein.
One fly tells another, Madeline, as she flies away in a huff, that when he says she looks like crap, it's a compliment.
Dog sitting in a stand selling other pups the chance to sniff her for $1.00, and has sign saying that cold noses are ok.
Spider tells psychiatrist how female spider lit a cigarette, looked him in the eye, and said they didn't call him "itsy bitsy spider" for nothing.
Famous last words from Charles Darwin, Thomas Edison, Leonardo Da Vinci, and Albert Bugleweed, whose last words were "Honey, how's your diet going'".
One fowl says since Gregory was cremated, he feels like he is with him - and there is a can of cream of chicken on the mantel.
Frog is upset because she has a date, and there are no warts on her face.
Stick of gum talking on phone tells friend she hasn't seen Ray all night, and he's probably stuck under some bar stool.
One pair of pliers tells another pair of pliers that Billy is being punished and can't come out and ply, instead of play.