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Pg 122 of 127

1993-01-28

An oyster gets her kids to irritate her husband so he'll make pearls.
1993-01-15

A woman says she doesn't want a one-night stand, so a man thinks they'll have a two-night stand.
1993-01-11

Ants only visit their mom on sundaes.
1992-12-31

Construction concrete blocks socialize, with one introducing himself as "very supportive," another looking for a "concrete relationship," and another eyeing the "hard body" of a cinder block.
1992-12-25

Two mice exchange Christmas gifts, which are both mousetraps for pest removal, and the husband encourages his wife to open her gift first.
1992-12-17

Zoo worker tells woman her husband was eaten by alligators, and she reacts with shock, but pleased because she will look good dressed in black.
1992-12-16

Prison inmate tells visitor to bake him a cake with a file in it, not for escaping, but for filing his ragged nails.
1992-12-05

Wife sneezes twice, so one man tells friend that she sneezes in pairs, while friend worries about the pears in the fruit bowl.
1992-11-28

Two clouds look down onto Earth and point out how different people resemble objects, such as a person looking like a dog with two heads.
1992-11-27

Two dinosaurs sit down for a meal of couch potatoes on their plates, which happen to be actual people laying on couches.
1992-11-21

Otis the octopus gets ready for a date by applying deodorant to his many underarms from an economy-sized deodorant applicator.
1992-11-14

Skunk agrees to play ball with other animals, including a raccoon and rabbit, but gives fair warning that he stinks.