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  • A white wine sets the thermostat too cold for red wine.
  • A woman reads The Giving Tree to her son and has nightmares about him harvesting her organs.
  • A cat pretends to like the gift her boyfriend got her.
  • A man gets so carried away decorating his house that he puts a wreath on the toilet seat.
  • A reindeer cheats on her husband with Rudolph and hides him in the closet.
  • A clay dreidel is not dry and ready because she showered too long before her date.
  • Night spent with Tony the Tiger wasn't grrreat for girlfriend.
  • Wife thinks husband is misusing party mix by eating it alone at home.
  • Man can say grace, but doesn't have any as he knocks over turkey.
  • Family questions validity of turkey's will that leaves drumsticks to dad.
  • A turkey turns her first husband into a duster because he doesn't like to clean.
  • Baseball tells friend that she can find a better date than wiffle ball.