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  • Slacker salmon go to spawn at a bar called The Downstreamer.
  • A man thinks this is the first time he's seen a woman without her dog, but really it's the first time he's seen her with her legs shaved.
  • A tired flower regrets marrying a morning glory.
  • Mr. Peanut's last words are "I'll be back in a Jif."
  • A woman on a date with an ugly man says she refuses to be an accomplice to passing on his genes.
  • A beaver wants to move, but he'll always live in the sticks.
  • A candle is annoyed she married a trick candle because he won't go out.
  • A horse fast food cashier accidentally asks a female horse if she wants a little roll in the hay instead of a little hay in her roll.
  • Mark takes the day off and lets his family come up with cartoon ideas.
  • The dark secret behind potato skins is that torturers remove Mr. Potatohead's skin.
  • A man is excited to meet hotbuns996, but she turns out to be the Pillsbury Doughboy.
  • Godzilla sees a girl Godzilla and wonders if hers is the face that lunched a thousand ships.