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  • Social media site asks chameleon if he wants to update his profile pic again with new color.
  • Because cat always slept beside her at computer, Deb installed track pad in the cat to keep working.
  • Future technology includes self-driving car, self-pedaling bike, self-shopping cart, and self-screaming coaster.
  • Daughter thinks phone in airplane mode is a toy airplane to throw outside.
  • As Jack climbs beanstalk, Giant complains that his stuff isn't safe in the cloud.
  • Wife complains to therapist her ipad husband falls asleep unless she is touching him.
  • God's creation of beg bugs posts gets less likes than his creation of pandas and cats.
  • Cat is caught on online photo having purr face on with another cat.
  • God reprimands Noah for building cubicles on ark, not cubits.
  • Nostradamus begins every social networking post with spoiler alert.
  • Wife is angry husband posted video of her dancing on YouTube.
  • It is difficult to work from home when cats sleep on you and your desk.