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  • Willie Wonka's parents get him a candy factory because he asked for a chocolate lab.
  • A reporter asks Casper the Friendly Ghost if he ever experimented with boo.
  • Mark updates nursery rhymes for the modern age.
  • A woman is hospitalized after a man unbalances and drops chemicals on her.
  • A messed-up Mr. Potatohead sues the company that irradiated him.
  • Cats research whether cats are more scared of vacuums or more drawn to can openers.
  • Birds make fun of Gene Roddenberry and poop on his car.
  • The Big Bad Wolf breaks his natural diet when he eats Little Red Riding Hood's grandma.
  • Mark updates nursery rhymes for the modern age.
  • Scientists will remove 90% of suffering and distress from humankind by getting rid of the lawyer gene.
  • The Pillsbury Dough Boy is on an IV of BHT.
  • A professor is trying to figure out what should go in the blank of "Running around like a ____ with its head cut off."