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  • Frustrated pool cue locked out of house tells forgetful billiard table to remember which pocket it put keys in.
  • Independence Day firework display writes closed captioning bangs in sky for hearing impaired viewers.
  • Uncomfortable owner invites relationship counselor to discuss toilet boundaries with invasive dog.
  • Three head male praying mantis at bar flirting with female insect evolved to mate more than once.
  • Australian predator crocodile couple with marsupial pocket sandwiches both like pita koalas.
  • Corn therapist asks popped corn couple at appointment if their relationship sometimes gets heated.
  • Embarrassed computer restarts after it says insulted crush is good condition for an older model.
  • Tattoo artist asks forgetful boyfriend if girlfriend’s name spelled Meagen, Meagan, Meaghan, Megan, Meggan, Meghan, Megan or Megyn.
  • Luke Skywalker & C3-PO try to get R2-D2 to replay message but robot porn video embarrasses droid who thought he deleted browser history.
  • Whale taxes accountant asks shark covered in clinging fish if has any dependents.
  • Loving dog drool kisses moisturize guy’s face every night.
  • Drink bottle in relationship therapy with milk carton tells therapist they’re hard to open up.