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  • Salmon have cybersex.
  • A geneticist is angry that a restaurant's twin lobster special contains lobsters who aren't related.
  • Cartoonist's spouses have nightmares where the cartoonists show them hundreds of unfunny cartoons.
  • Two losers in an office want to get recognized as zeroes in Y2K.
  • Slacker salmon go to spawn at a bar called The Downstreamer.
  • A man thinks this is the first time he's seen a woman without her dog, but really it's the first time he's seen her with her legs shaved.
  • A tired flower regrets marrying a morning glory.
  • Mr. Peanut's last words are "I'll be back in a Jif."
  • A woman on a date with an ugly man says she refuses to be an accomplice to passing on his genes.
  • A beaver wants to move, but he'll always live in the sticks.
  • A candle is annoyed she married a trick candle because he won't go out.
  • A horse fast food cashier accidentally asks a female horse if she wants a little roll in the hay instead of a little hay in her roll.