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  • An angel cat adjusts to feather hairballs in heaven from grooming.
  • Doctors try life-saving measures when patient's phone ringtone sounds like erratic heart monitor
  • Turkey kid prefers to go to school after his mom uses a meat thermometer to take his temperature.
  • Patients diagnose themselves in the self-service section of doctor's office.
  • Mercury thermometer tells young digital thermometers a story of how hard life used to be.
  • Nylonol, parody of Tylenol found only on the black market and a pain reliever made for bank robbers.
  • Superstitious germy rituals of baseball players would be would make for lousy surgeon.
  • Incompetent doctor diagnoses patient with good and bad news of a clamp left in his temporal lobe.
  • Only one contestant in a hot dog eating contest finishes a hot dog after touring a hot dog factory.
  • The only X-ray apron available at the dentist says "Kiss the Patient."
  • The smoking area at the fireworks factory is very, very far away.
  • Doctor explains new brain scan that tells wife is too fat.