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  • Pet cats usually give dead mouse Christmas gift but this year living rodents presents startle owners.
  • Tortoise slowly races around livingroom & owner says she loves when he has the zoomies.
  • Undead Frankenstein & ghoul monsters on golf course lose arms & golf clubs tying game.
  • Canine coach in dugout says entire baseball fumbling Chihuahuas dog team has yips.
  • Player dogs on tennis court with balls stuffed in mouth wonder why ran out again.
  • Boy on boat asks why ocean called squid cove & Dad scares squids’ black water ink defense.
  • Squirrel runs fence post exercise treadmill watching bird seed feeder tv screen goal.
  • Late night cat zoomie aerobic class exercises wild racing around house workout.
  • Greedy King Midas jumps in swimming pool, belly flops painfully on hard golden metal water.
  • Stinging fire ants in anthill bite aardvark tongue and it runs screaming in pain.
  • Cat says barefoot lady stepping on dead mouse gift is learning his love language.
  • Baseball annoyed by irritating date’s finger joint popping thinks last time I date a knuckle ball.