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  • A fish can't sleep because a boat transporting Rice Krispies sank near his bed.
  • The Pillsbury Dough Boy's X-ray shows he has internal trauma from being poked so many times.
  • Rhinos hurt their faces rubbing their noses together.
  • Jack eats the magic beans after his mom throws them out the window.
  • Birds wait for a man to shovel his car out of the snow so they can poop on it.
  • A mechanic has been acting funny and making weird noises, but he's normal when his wife takes him to the doctor.
  • Mike Tyson becomes a plastic surgeon because he's an expert at reducing ears.
  • Cat aliens abduct a vet and return him with a cone to keep him from scratching his incisions.
  • A geriatric patient makes note to call dentist about missing dentures and doctor about pain in butt.
  • Fairy tale Jack goes to the hospital with multiple injuries.
  • An alien vaporizes her husband to cure his cold.
  • Mark updates nursery rhymes for the modern age.