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  • Charlie Brown's surgeon preps him with a zig-zag line around his torso.
  • Dilbert goes to the doctor because his tie keeps poking him in the eye when he ties his shoe.
  • A brain surgeon finds a part of his patient's brain that makes him punch the nurse.
  • A pig smoking cigarettes is smoked ham; a pig on the nicotine patch is a cured ham.
  • Doctors try to inject mojo into Michael Bolton, but his body can't handle it.
  • Medusa sneezes and all her snakes stand on end.
  • A man tells his wife he had his secretary on his laptop most of the day and she pours soup all over him.
  • Dr. Seuss is supposed to outgrow gibberish talk as a child.
  • Toads prank their friend by freezing his warts off.
  • Linus uses a pumpkin patch to curb his craving to wait up all night for The Great Pumpkin.
  • Nicotine gum happens when Gumby smokes too many cigarettes.
  • A Beanie Baby has to take Gas-B-Gone to stop farting from eating beans.