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  • A dog gets carded at the liquor store and says he only has to be 3 to be 21 in dog years.
  • A man's pet parrot reposts his tweets.
  • A burglar is going to get caught because he feels bad about dislodging his victims' cat from his lap.
  • A tie-dyed tie dies.
  • The police revoke a man's artistic license when he draws Wolverine with 5 claws instead of 3.
  • Dogs on cooking shows can't judge effectively because they ate too fast to taste the dishes.
  • The cartoonist lets his family come up with ideas for his father's day cartoon.
  • A cop arrests a man in a robber costume and the robber complains that he's being profiled.
  • A family wanted to get a dog, but the cats filibustered the decision.
  • A man wants to see other people -- a movie called Other People.
  • A cup cheats on her husband with a cup holder.
  • A new pickpocket tears off a man's entire pocket.